Waves

I went to the sea like I have done every morning to swim in Greece. It was a windy day. Windier than usual. I was feeling a bit off that morning. I woke up with resistance and agitation. It was the layering of expectations I have placed on myself to perform, to do, to make the most of every moment.

I stood at the edge of the water as the waves rolled in.

I kept staring at the sea noticing the waves as they rolled in, choppy and chaotic. As I felt the water touch my feet, I thought it isn’t even that cold will it be worth it to swim. I’ve grown to enjoy the ice cold water which either isn’t as cold now that the summer heat has arrived or I’ve gotten used to the temperature. Maybe it’s a little bit of both?

My mind kept making up excuses about why it’s not a good idea to swim.

There’s no one around.

I’m alone, what if something happens to me?

What if the waves pull me out?

What if I won’t have the same feeling I have every morning after a swim?

It’s too rough, it may be too strong for you.

And it went on….

The mind is a funny thing that way. It likes to make up excuses about why you shouldn’t do something, even if it’s the very thing you want to do, that you know you need to do, that your soul is calling for you to experience.

So in that moment as my mind was running its own course, before I could let it continue on with any more excuses, I pulled off my shirt and shorts and walked into the sea.

After a few steps I could feel the release of the resistance. I could feel the mind start to calm and quiet. The temperature seemed to change a bit as I entered. I felt my body soften even in the cold waters. It felt like a warm hug on a cold winter night.

I kept going further out and eventually started to swim. The waves kept pushing past me on their way to the shore and I kept swimming through them to go into the beyond.

A nervousness grew. I felt my mind kick back up again.

The waves were strong.

But I was stronger.

I heard in my head…you’ve swam in rough seas before.

You know how to swim. You know how to do this. You can do this. This is going to be okay, you are going to be okay. Just swim. And just breathe.

And so I did just that.

It was a reminder of all the times where I felt like the water would go above my head in life.

When I felt like I couldn’t handle something or I felt like life was too much.

When I moved to a new city and was worried about making friends.

When I left my full-time work to create my own wellness business.

When I ended a relationship knowing it wasn’t right for me.

When I packed up my life 5 weeks ago and got a one-way ticket to Greece to start the adventure I’ve always wanted.

In all of those experiences, I felt the resistance build up inside of me, making excuses about why I shouldn’t do something even though I knew it was something that I wanted or would be good for me.

There are many times on this current journey I’ve wanted to turn back. To go back to the U.S. To not move ahead. To return to what feels comfortable.

And then I remember that I’ve done this before, many times. I’ve swam out into the sea and returned. Coming back with a new perspective, new insight, new awareness about myself and the world.

Resistance will always be there. Especially when the waves of life and our mind are strong. When we move through the resistance, we can find a release of all that we’ve been holding that doesn’t serve us. That holds us back from living a full life.

A life we’ve been dreaming of, hoping for.

A life that fulfills us and makes us feel joy and freedom.

We can push past our fears and find our way to a path full of possibility and expansion.

My Invitation:

Take some time this week to notice where the resistance shows up for you. Notice how it shows up and what it may be saying.

Maybe it’s the resistance to going to the gym or going for a walk. Maybe it’s resistance to tell someone how you really feel, to be honest. Maybe it’s the resistance to take a step forward in your career or relationships.

Wherever it is, notice. And then see where you can take a small step forward through the resistance to see what’s on the other side.